Sandwiches in the stalls and coughs in the cinema — hell is an audience

As I sat in the auditorium of Sadler’s Wells waiting for the Northern Ballet’s Jane Eyre to begin, my heart sank. For there, in the row in front sat A Cougher. Cough cough, she went. Splutter. Ahem-Ahem.

Twenty minutes in, the noise was near-continuous — a whirlwind of wheezing, a homophony of hacking…READ MORE